Sunday, we went to a swimming pool just a short drive by taxi outside of town. It was a lot of fun, and much needed. Being able to immerse oneself in water makes everything so much better. But here, too, cultural differences abound.
In the first place, there were two distinct sections: a men’s section and a family section, which meant women and children could be there. We wanted the family section, which was a little bit more well-kept, and one of us was married with his wife, so we boldly strode forward into the family section. After a brief row with a security guard, who saw five men and one woman and didn’t like it, a local man came to our rescue and argued that we would not cause a problem, and that he should let us stay. So we did.
However, the male members of our group did make a few forays onto the other side, where we were stared at, asked to play basketball with, and more than a little discomfited by the absence of even a single female member of the species. However, the men’s side had all the best waterslides.
During the course of the day one topic of conversation that came up was how the reasoning behind such separation hinges on a supposedly Koranic teaching that men can’t control themselves, which is why women here are encouraged to wear full headscarfs and trenchcoats in 100-degree weather. If that’s the case, then why do these out-of-control men get all the privileges and status in society? It is, as our female companion put it, “rewarding bad behavior.”
If, as men, we are so incapable of controlling ourselves, why don’t you lock us away in the kitchen and home all day and let the more level-headed women deal with the business of life outside the home? The logic makes no sense to me. I say men sure are responsible for their behavior, and the heavier the consequences for behaving irresponsibly, the better!
Women ought to be treated with respect and dignity, in spite of whatever male urges we might have. Making them over up to the point of discomfort only hides the problem, it doesn’t deal with it. Only the heart-changing power of the Gospel can work to break the problem, and even then, it often takes quite a long time, as I can attest personally.
I don't know who explained the sex separation in the pool to you but ı'm sure you have the wrong info. In Koranic teaching women are very precious and have dignity and privileges in all areas.
ReplyDeleteShowing her body to everyone does not give dignity to a woman but keeping her private things only for her husband makes her precious, unique and valuable in her husband's (and also) peoples' eye.
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ReplyDeleteHi Jeremy. Although I read your observations about our culture with a great interest, I think you mis-explained what you had thought. For the last paragraph:
ReplyDeleteGod created orange with an orange peel, water melon with its peel; man manufactures electric cable with an exterior plastic protection. So, the protection of valuable stuff is the rule of nature.
orange has orange peel because its valuable.man has skin to get him protected her/himself of exterior affects.the electric cable without that plastic protection could be dangerous for livings and also could easily be broken down.
as a bottom line, Islam advises women wear scarf because they, in the light of Islamic philosophy, are precious. women are dangerous when they are -ultra liberated- likewise an electric cable that does not have plastic protection.women wear scarf likewise man has skin.they have to protect themselves.I like pretty ladies, every men like sexy ladies.if one claims he does not, I am afraid he is not a man anymore. lol
So, better to be cautious than having troubles afterwards.
Correct me if I am wrong, religious Christians also wear very, you know, religiously lol, and when I said "religious Christians" I did not mean to say nuns...
anyway, enjoy your stay and take great memories and experience to your friends and family.
To Zeyni Artik (sorry if my capitalization was wrong):
ReplyDeleteThere are some extremely conservative Christian sects other than nuns in which women do dress in extremely modest ways, such as the Amish. But these sects are few at least in America.
There are also Christian women through out all denominations (conservative and liberal) who choose to dress modestly on an individual basis and not because their religion teaches it.
While I do appreciate the value placed on women in Islam culture things are very different in America.
If a man were to call a woman "precious" and say that because of that she has to dress a certain way to protect herself it would be considered very offensive. Quite possibly this would lead to a sexual-harassment based court battle in which the man would without a doubt lose and probably be sued for a very large sum of money.
Here women are given just as much independence as men (in most cases, with exception in those extra-conservative sects) and are allowed to dress however they choose.
Most self-respecting women dress fairly modestly anyway though. (There is a general exception of modest at the beach or other swimming places where the general -but not universal- idea is to stay cool and get as tan as possible. Personally I'm one of the few American women who only sees tanning as a potential source of skin cancer and thus not worth it).
I'm sure the American definition of modesty is quite different than the Islam one.
I think that each of these cultural ideas has it's own merit within the context of the culture from which it comes. In other words modesty standards in Turkey work in Turkey but would not in the U.S., and modesty standards in the U.S. work in the U.S. but would not in Turkey.
I should add that even the modest among American women dress comfortably according to seasons. Cooler clothes (short sleeves, skirts, shorter pants) in the summer) and warmer clothes (long sleeves, and pants or long skirts or skirts with boots, jackets and sweaters, and multiple layers) in the winter. This does vary according to climate zone though. Those of us in the South where it is warmer all year long tend to where light sweaters and pants in the winter and those in the north where winters are much colder wear heavier layers).
ReplyDeleteThat is why Jeremy was concerned about women wearing multiple layers in 100 degree weather. Comfortable clothes are important to Americans.
There are some very uncomfortable fashions though, such as high heeled shoes.
ReplyDeleteI guess it goes like this in America.
Comfort takes priority over modesty (though there are modest comfortable clothes) and fashion, in some cases, takes priority over comfort (but there are comfortable fashions as well as modest fashions.)