Vacations and Coming Back

THIS POST WAS WRITTEN A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO, BUT NEVER QUITE FINISHED. I'VE POSTED IT HERE ANYWAY.

Just returned from two weeks spent trouncing around Turkey with the love of my life. This vacation was much needed for a variety of reasons. It was invaluable for Christina’s and my relationship, allowing us to be together in the same place for the first time since we began dating. Unfortunately, I won’t divulge much more on that subject - our relationship is worthy of a blog of its own, so I will do the difficult task and maintain the focus of this blog on the experience of this country.

And that experience during this vacation revealed to me that, when you actually get out in it, this country isn’t so bad. Not that it’s bad usually, but when life becomes routine and you feel trapped at work all day every day and uninterested in doing anything else after work, it can seem that way. It seems boring and depressing. But seeing new, wonderful parts of it breathes fresh life into the experience of living here.

When I returned, however, it was right back into the grind. There was a major upheaval that resulted from administrative missteps, and soured my mood about this experience almost immediately. I won’t go into detail because it is not my intention to defame my workplace. However, I will express how it has affected me.

How can I respond to these fiascos? Well, in typical introspective fashion, I find myself asking how this is affecting my relationship with Christ and my experience of the Gospel. In other words, I’m asking myself: “What is God teaching me through this?”

First, of course, is perseverance. Whatever poor decisions are made by admins, I am responsible for my own reaction, and I still have a job to do. All I can do is do the best that I can in my responsibilities.

Second, I can’t help but ask the same question I have been asking, which has been on my mind from the beginning: how much of this is cultural, how much is unique to my employer?

Third, it may be God’s way of showing me the drawbacks of inefficiency and sluggardly work. I often worry about my work ethic. I think I’m too lazy, or too undisciplined. Seeing the negative results of such attitudes in others helps me desire to avoid them myself. It is essentially a motivator - I see how bad things get, so I want to do better myself. The problem is, I am still too self-focused when I think this way.

And that brings me back to the gospel.